1
00:00:02,510 --> 00:00:04,950
Thank you for being a friend.

2
00:00:06,490 --> 00:00:09,370
Travel down the road and back again.

3
00:00:10,190 --> 00:00:12,110
Your heart is true.

4
00:00:12,330 --> 00:00:15,370
You're a pal and a confidant.

5
00:00:17,250 --> 00:00:24,130
And if you threw a party, invited
everyone you knew,

6
00:00:24,470 --> 00:00:30,790
you would see the biggest gift would be
from me and the car.

7
00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:00,120
What are you doing?

8
00:01:00,260 --> 00:01:01,760
I'm cooking. I couldn't sleep.

9
00:01:02,060 --> 00:01:03,560
Me neither. What are you making?

10
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:08,720
Sausage and peppers, pasta pesto, and
ziti with oil and garlic.

11
00:01:08,980 --> 00:01:10,120
Ooh, ooh. And what's this?

12
00:01:10,780 --> 00:01:12,040
Garbage. Rose cooked it.

13
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:17,180
Ooh, this kitchen smells terrific. My
chipped beef must be done.

14
00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:22,020
Oh, Sophia, would you like a little
scoop on some lightly toasted white

15
00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:23,760
Who do I look like, Beetle Bailey?

16
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:30,470
Ma. My, you'll never guess who I was
just on the phone with. Uncle Vito.

17
00:01:30,730 --> 00:01:31,708
How did you know?

18
00:01:31,710 --> 00:01:33,310
I picked up the phone and listened in.

19
00:01:35,550 --> 00:01:36,770
It's a little thing I do.

20
00:01:37,630 --> 00:01:41,470
Girls, my Uncle Vito is coming to Miami
for a visit, and he's going to stay with

21
00:01:41,470 --> 00:01:44,350
us. He arrives Thursday. He's going to
stay a whole week.

22
00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:45,770
Where is he going to stay?

23
00:01:46,130 --> 00:01:48,150
Well, if he can take my room, I'll
double up with Ma.

24
00:01:48,450 --> 00:01:51,570
Well, I was going to say, would you...
My cousin Milo's coming. Don't you

25
00:01:51,570 --> 00:01:55,830
remember? He's going to be in town for
the 14th Annual Hog Expo.

26
00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:02,040
Is it the 14th annual already?

27
00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:05,880
It seems just like yesterday. It was the
12th annual.

28
00:02:07,380 --> 00:02:09,520
Sunrise, sunrise, sunrise.

29
00:02:10,660 --> 00:02:13,440
Dorothy, now cut it out. What are we
going to do?

30
00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:18,080
We'll figure out some arrangements. We
always make do. Besides, everything will

31
00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:21,620
work out fine as long as I do not have
to sleep with Rose.

32
00:02:21,980 --> 00:02:23,820
Me? Why don't you want to sleep with me?

33
00:02:24,040 --> 00:02:26,960
Well, honey, for starters, you talk in
your sleep.

34
00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:29,420
Now, let's face it, you know Dick Cavett
awake.

35
00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:33,160
I do not talk in my sleep.

36
00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,640
Oh, yes, you do, too. And you snore.

37
00:02:35,940 --> 00:02:38,960
No, I don't. Dorothy snores. Oh, that's
right.

38
00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:43,040
Dorothy, I swear you snore worse than a
sailor passed out at an adult motel

39
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:47,080
after a night of unbridled passion while
I had to call a cab to take me home.

40
00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:54,910
That's my... And the point is, you snow
her.

41
00:02:55,910 --> 00:02:58,470
Hey, let's face it. None of you was a
day at the beach.

42
00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:02,910
Remember when we had that cold snap and
the heat gave out? Boy, what a night.

43
00:03:13,450 --> 00:03:16,750
Salvador, if you want to fool around,
take off your T -shirt.

44
00:03:20,550 --> 00:03:22,570
You're going to get linguine all over
me.

45
00:03:23,580 --> 00:03:26,880
Ma, Ma, go back to sleep. It's just me,
Dorothy.

46
00:03:27,780 --> 00:03:29,300
Get the hell out of my bed.

47
00:03:30,540 --> 00:03:33,160
Ma, the heat went out again.

48
00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:37,100
I'm freezing to death. You're the only
one who has an electric blanket.

49
00:03:37,580 --> 00:03:40,760
I'll die under here with you. Your body
is like a heat sponge.

50
00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:44,220
You'll suck up all the heat and I'll get
up in the morning a frozen fish stick.

51
00:03:45,420 --> 00:03:47,660
Ma, don't be ridiculous. Just turn up
the heat.

52
00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:50,980
It's already on nine. On ten you can
cook a lean cuisine.

53
00:03:52,590 --> 00:03:53,590
Good night, Ma.

54
00:03:58,490 --> 00:04:04,410
You know, Ma, this reminds me of the
time the heat went out in our old

55
00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:05,410
back in Brooklyn.

56
00:04:05,930 --> 00:04:10,250
I was about, oh, seven years old because
I was still sleeping with my rag doll,

57
00:04:10,510 --> 00:04:11,510
Mrs. Doolittle.

58
00:04:12,390 --> 00:04:15,610
I remember I woke up in the middle of
the night with my teeth chattering.

59
00:04:15,910 --> 00:04:19,510
I got out of bed, tiptoed to your
bedroom door.

60
00:04:19,970 --> 00:04:22,089
I opened it a crack and I whispered,

61
00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:24,580
Mommy, Mrs.

62
00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:26,280
Doolittle is cold.

63
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:28,480
Mommy, Mrs.

64
00:04:29,020 --> 00:04:31,900
Doolittle... Dorothy. Yes, Ma? Cut that
crap. I'm not in the mood.

65
00:04:35,380 --> 00:04:38,900
Oh, girls. Girls, can I please share
your electric blanket?

66
00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:43,180
No. Oh, come on. I can't sleep. My bed's
never been so cold.

67
00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:44,960
Especially on a Saturday night.

68
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,580
Oh, Walt, write that in.

69
00:04:53,550 --> 00:04:54,670
Listen, did you hear that sound?

70
00:04:55,290 --> 00:04:58,390
Yeah, and as long as I'm in my own bed,
I'll do what I want.

71
00:05:16,310 --> 00:05:18,610
I mean, it sounded like the heat kicking
on.

72
00:05:19,330 --> 00:05:21,330
Thank God. Get back to your own beds.

73
00:05:21,710 --> 00:05:22,710
Everybody.

74
00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:26,480
Well, what are you doing? I've been
tinkering with the heater, trying to get

75
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:28,120
to work. Oh, Rose, you're a genius.

76
00:05:28,660 --> 00:05:30,940
Boy, that's a sentence you don't hear
every day.

77
00:05:32,900 --> 00:05:35,440
She's working great now, except for one
little thing.

78
00:05:35,840 --> 00:05:39,760
I turned the air conditioner on instead
of the heater, and now it won't go off.

79
00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:43,100
Great! Now it's going to be colder
inside than it is outside.

80
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:44,760
I think you're right.

81
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:47,460
There's an icicle forming on the nose of
my bunny slippers.

82
00:05:58,860 --> 00:06:00,440
Get your bunny nose out of my butt.

83
00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:06,140
Let's just get some sleep.

84
00:06:06,420 --> 00:06:07,420
Good night, Ma.

85
00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:09,520
Good night, Mo. Good night, Laurie.

86
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:15,740
I'm not going to be able to sleep.

87
00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:17,900
I'm on the wrong side of the bed.

88
00:06:18,100 --> 00:06:21,540
Well, I usually sleep on the right side,
and I want to be on the right side.

89
00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:24,560
What the hell is everyone so particular
about?

90
00:06:24,940 --> 00:06:26,860
In Sicily, four in a bed is a treat.

91
00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:37,440
family is on vacation i slept with my
two brothers until i was 17 i was

92
00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:43,240
to one for a very short period of time
but that's a separate story

93
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:50,080
i wouldn't mind hearing it oh rose shut
up everybody stay where you are and go

94
00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:52,380
to sleep i have to go to work early in
the morning

95
00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:58,140
Oh, darn, I forgot something.

96
00:06:58,380 --> 00:06:59,380
Go in your pajamas.

97
00:07:00,740 --> 00:07:02,520
No, not that.

98
00:07:02,940 --> 00:07:08,700
I forgot to say my prayers. Oh, Rose,
God wouldn't mind if you skipped a

99
00:07:09,260 --> 00:07:13,220
He's very busy these days. Most of his
free time is spent talking to Pat

100
00:07:13,220 --> 00:07:14,220
Robertson.

101
00:07:16,240 --> 00:07:17,240
Hello,

102
00:07:17,900 --> 00:07:20,080
God, it's me, Rose Nyland.

103
00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:23,160
I'm sorry to be getting in touch so late
tonight.

104
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:24,820
I hope I didn't wake you.

105
00:07:25,660 --> 00:07:26,660
Oh, God.

106
00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:29,760
One at a time, Blanche.

107
00:07:32,620 --> 00:07:37,760
Anyway, I just wanted to say I think
you're still doing a terrific job.

108
00:07:38,460 --> 00:07:40,760
Of course, there are some things I don't
understand.

109
00:07:41,380 --> 00:07:42,380
Like poverty.

110
00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,600
And the spokesmodel category on Star
Search.

111
00:07:48,650 --> 00:07:51,790
But then again, you work your wonders in
mysterious ways.

112
00:07:52,890 --> 00:07:56,750
A couple of years ago, on a night like
this, I would have frozen to death

113
00:07:56,750 --> 00:07:57,970
because I was by myself.

114
00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:04,430
Now I have Dorothy and Blanche and
Sophia to keep me warm. Not just on a

115
00:08:04,430 --> 00:08:06,210
winter's night, but all year long.

116
00:08:08,150 --> 00:08:09,770
Take care of them, God.

117
00:08:10,130 --> 00:08:14,710
If anything happened, I just... Rose,
thanks for the lovely prayer.

118
00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:24,440
Now shut up and get into bed.

119
00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:27,160
Amen.

120
00:08:33,020 --> 00:08:34,580
Nice work, daughter.

121
00:08:35,520 --> 00:08:36,520
Wasn't me.

122
00:08:41,380 --> 00:08:43,179
Sweet Jesus, am I in trouble.

123
00:08:47,660 --> 00:08:48,740
Now I lay me down to sleep.

124
00:08:51,380 --> 00:08:53,420
You know, I'd almost forgotten about
that night.

125
00:08:53,940 --> 00:08:58,040
With all of us cramped into that bed, I
had to sleep in positions I never

126
00:08:58,040 --> 00:08:59,060
thought possible.

127
00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:01,320
Me too.

128
00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:12,800
Sophia, when's that food going to be
ready to taste?

129
00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:14,580
Oh, my chip beef is ready.

130
00:09:14,970 --> 00:09:17,710
Oh, well, I was more in the mood for
something hot. Mine's hot.

131
00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:19,990
Well, I was more in the mood for
something spicy.

132
00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:21,310
Well, mine's spicy.

133
00:09:21,530 --> 00:09:24,450
She was more in the mood for something
that wouldn't test her gag reflex.

134
00:09:26,170 --> 00:09:30,070
I'll fix you a plate of mine, Blanche.
And I'll try some of yours, Rose.

135
00:09:30,430 --> 00:09:31,430
Coming right up.

136
00:09:33,870 --> 00:09:38,730
Oh, I hate thunderstorms. They make me a
nervous wreck.

137
00:09:39,030 --> 00:09:41,350
That's another reason I don't like to
bunk with you, Rose.

138
00:09:41,950 --> 00:09:44,870
Everything makes you nervous, and when
you're nervous, you get unbearable.

139
00:09:45,310 --> 00:09:48,990
Do you remember that awful night you
came barging into my room like a raven

140
00:09:48,990 --> 00:09:50,870
lunatic? I was ready to kill you.

141
00:09:54,430 --> 00:09:54,950
Come

142
00:09:54,950 --> 00:10:03,530
in.

143
00:10:04,310 --> 00:10:09,550
Little Hatch, I just heard on the radio
two killers escaped from a Georgia state

144
00:10:09,550 --> 00:10:10,550
penitentiary.

145
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:14,660
So? So, they could be headed here.

146
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:18,880
Honey, they escaped in Georgia. Why on
earth would they come to Miami?

147
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:20,620
For the same reason we did.

148
00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:23,400
Eligible men?

149
00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:27,500
Rose, I'm sure there's nothing to worry
about.

150
00:10:28,300 --> 00:10:30,760
Well, I just thought you ought to know.

151
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:32,080
Yeah, I appreciate it.

152
00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:35,320
I won't bother you again.

153
00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:36,560
Good night.

154
00:10:39,980 --> 00:10:44,100
I'm too scared to go back to my room.
This kind of thing has always frightened

155
00:10:44,100 --> 00:10:47,780
me, ever since I was a little girl. When
I first heard my parents whispering

156
00:10:47,780 --> 00:10:50,080
about the St. Olaf slasher.

157
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:55,580
Slasher? Yes. Oh, he terrorized St. Olaf
for months.

158
00:10:56,020 --> 00:11:00,380
In the dark of night, he'd sneak into an
unsuspecting farmer's field and

159
00:11:00,380 --> 00:11:03,620
mercilessly slash his scarecrow to
shreds.

160
00:11:05,660 --> 00:11:07,600
He was a scarecrow slasher?

161
00:11:09,020 --> 00:11:10,020
Oh, Natalie.

162
00:11:10,340 --> 00:11:14,160
Although he was suspected in the
disfigurement of several whips, Brooke.

163
00:11:15,780 --> 00:11:19,780
Oh, I was so scared at night I'd sleep
in the closet so he couldn't find me.

164
00:11:19,860 --> 00:11:22,420
Rose, don't say another word to me. Just
get into bed, but don't say another

165
00:11:22,420 --> 00:11:25,020
word. Oh, Blanche, you'll never even
know I'm here.

166
00:11:25,260 --> 00:11:30,420
When are you coming to bed, Blanche? In
a minute.

167
00:11:32,660 --> 00:11:33,660
What are you doing?

168
00:11:34,180 --> 00:11:35,860
I am contouring my eyebrows.

169
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:40,680
I use Miss Christy Brinkley as a guide
because we have exactly the same bone

170
00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:41,680
structure.

171
00:11:44,020 --> 00:11:46,840
I just hope she doesn't let herself go
to pot after that baby comes.

172
00:11:47,500 --> 00:11:50,640
I don't want that big -eyed husband of
hers coming after me.

173
00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:59,280
I never do very much with my eyebrows.

174
00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:02,460
That's why from the nose up you look
like Wilbur Brimley.

175
00:12:04,260 --> 00:12:06,020
Now, don't say another word. Just go to
sleep.

176
00:12:07,150 --> 00:12:09,390
Can I leave my light on? All right, yes,
yes.

177
00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:17,870
I want you to know, Blanche, I really
appreciate this.

178
00:12:17,950 --> 00:12:18,950
Did I just say go to sleep?

179
00:12:21,290 --> 00:12:23,070
I can't. I'm too scared.

180
00:12:24,170 --> 00:12:25,310
Tell me a story.

181
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:29,290
What? Tell me a story. It always worked
when I was a little girl. I don't know

182
00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:30,249
any stories.

183
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,930
Make one. Oh, all right.

184
00:12:33,090 --> 00:12:35,330
Once upon a time, there were three
bales. Not that one.

185
00:12:35,590 --> 00:12:36,590
Pig. No.

186
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:39,570
Elephants. And they lived with a little
girl named Rose.

187
00:12:39,990 --> 00:12:41,910
The elephants lived in the house?

188
00:12:42,190 --> 00:12:43,190
They were elephant dolls.

189
00:12:45,670 --> 00:12:48,650
Every night when Rose would go to bed,
she'd take the three elephants with her

190
00:12:48,650 --> 00:12:50,710
because they made her feel so safe and
secure.

191
00:12:51,170 --> 00:12:52,170
Elephant dolls?

192
00:12:52,330 --> 00:12:53,630
Right, elephant dolls.

193
00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:57,830
Until finally, one night, they got so
sick and tired of Rose annoying them

194
00:12:57,830 --> 00:13:01,810
they went off to sleep someplace else.
And two big old escaped convicts snuck

195
00:13:01,810 --> 00:13:03,390
through the window and murdered Rose in
her sleep.

196
00:13:24,430 --> 00:13:25,510
That lady was the leader.

197
00:13:25,850 --> 00:13:27,770
Please, tell me something I don't know.

198
00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:30,970
Dorothy, you didn't even taste my
chippy.

199
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:33,230
Of course I did, Rose.

200
00:13:34,910 --> 00:13:38,830
You didn't like it. Oh, don't be
ridiculous. I loved it.

201
00:13:39,310 --> 00:13:40,550
Well, then have another bite.

202
00:13:45,050 --> 00:13:46,050
Okay.

203
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:57,840
must be down.

204
00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:01,180
That's just great. I got ten pounds of
fresh clams in the refrigerator.

205
00:14:05,260 --> 00:14:10,560
Rose, that was delicious. Oh, thank you.

206
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:14,020
Who moved my purse?

207
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,180
Why does it feel so heavy?

208
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:24,600
Now, uh, listen, you know,

209
00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:29,360
We have these people who are coming to
visit and we still haven't decided what

210
00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:32,600
our sleeping arrangements are going to
be. I volunteer to sleep with Sophia.

211
00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:36,500
Oh, no, I think I should sleep with Ma.
I mean, we've done it many times before.

212
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,320
We always get along just fine.

213
00:14:38,660 --> 00:14:42,100
Except when you're sick. You remember
the time you had bronchitis? Oh, honey,

214
00:14:42,100 --> 00:14:43,100
was really...

215
00:14:56,740 --> 00:14:58,680
Cool as a cucumber, thank God.

216
00:14:59,060 --> 00:15:00,980
Ma, you woke me up.

217
00:15:01,300 --> 00:15:02,760
It's time to take your medicine anyway.

218
00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:04,620
I just took my medicine.

219
00:15:05,020 --> 00:15:07,720
You took it after dinner, and then you
went to sleep.

220
00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:11,260
Now, read me how much medicine you're
supposed to take. I don't remember.

221
00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:14,900
Two teaspoons every six hours.

222
00:15:15,140 --> 00:15:15,879
That's wrong.

223
00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:18,000
Ma, it's written here in black and
white.

224
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:21,060
So, the pharmacist made a mistake. He's
not perfect.

225
00:15:21,340 --> 00:15:24,260
The man really knew what he was doing.
He would be a doctor instead of just

226
00:15:24,260 --> 00:15:25,260
dressing like one.

227
00:15:26,670 --> 00:15:29,130
Give me a break. I'll take my medicine
later.

228
00:15:29,390 --> 00:15:33,310
You know you're a lousy patient. What do
you want from me? I'm sick.

229
00:15:33,910 --> 00:15:35,050
I don't know that.

230
00:15:35,670 --> 00:15:39,070
You think I've been sitting here for
three nights just to look at you?

231
00:15:40,350 --> 00:15:42,070
Believe me, you're no oil painting.

232
00:15:43,730 --> 00:15:47,630
I've been sitting here because I thought
you needed me. You needed me when you

233
00:15:47,630 --> 00:15:51,850
had the mump, the chicken pox, whooping
cough, rubella.

234
00:15:52,550 --> 00:15:54,390
Or was rubella our cleaning lady?

235
00:15:56,200 --> 00:16:00,900
It doesn't matter. The point is, it
hurts me to see my baby sick. But if I'm

236
00:16:00,900 --> 00:16:03,700
only being a nuisance, I'll be happy to
leave you alone.

237
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,280
Oh, Ma, Ma, wait.

238
00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:07,880
Ma, no, don't. Ma, Ma, don't.

239
00:16:08,120 --> 00:16:09,260
Ma, Ma, please.

240
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:14,780
Come back here, Ma. I do need you. I do
need you. I'm sorry. I'm just cranky.

241
00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:18,520
No, you're right. I am a lousy patient.
I always have been.

242
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:27,500
I remember when I was a little girl and
used to get those terrible chest colds,

243
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:32,400
and you'd whip up a batch of that
homemade liniment to rub on my chest.

244
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:34,900
Ooh, that was nasty stuff.

245
00:16:35,540 --> 00:16:40,240
Cod liver oil, garlic, petroleum jelly,
parsley.

246
00:16:40,780 --> 00:16:46,100
I remember once I asked you, why
parsley? You said, presentation is very

247
00:16:46,100 --> 00:16:47,100
important.

248
00:16:51,910 --> 00:16:56,730
Oh, whenever I saw you coming down the
hall with that ceramic bowl and a

249
00:16:56,730 --> 00:17:00,390
paintbrush, I'd run and hide under my
bed and cry.

250
00:17:01,910 --> 00:17:06,530
Then you'd rub some on my doll, Mrs.
Doolittle, to show me that it didn't

251
00:17:07,290 --> 00:17:13,030
And I'd come out from under the bed and
you'd put it on my chest and next day

252
00:17:13,030 --> 00:17:14,030
I'd always feel better.

253
00:17:14,770 --> 00:17:15,770
You remember, Ma?

254
00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:36,080
Good night, Mom.

255
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:40,600
Thanks for everything.

256
00:17:47,860 --> 00:17:50,540
I heard every word you said. I wasn't
asleep.

257
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,200
I was just resting my eyes so you'd
leave me alone.

258
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,180
I used to do that with your father.

259
00:17:55,460 --> 00:17:57,360
It only worked about half of the time.

260
00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:01,080
Asleep, awake, it didn't matter to him.

261
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:06,640
are built that way.

262
00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:09,020
No, it's a fact. I saw Dr.

263
00:18:09,220 --> 00:18:12,300
Art Uline explain it on a Today show
with a plastic model.

264
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:19,400
Please, Ma, you slept like a baby. I
know because I spent the whole night

265
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:20,400
in that chair.

266
00:18:20,620 --> 00:18:24,280
Well, it couldn't be any worse than
trying to sleep on a hard wooden bench

267
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:25,920
the middle of a railway station.

268
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:28,960
Boy, you do it anyplace, don't you blame
me.

269
00:18:31,820 --> 00:18:34,880
Blanche is talking about coming back
from Edna McCarthy's funeral.

270
00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:37,700
Edna McCarthy is dead?

271
00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:40,560
Oh, my God, that's terrible.

272
00:18:40,780 --> 00:18:42,460
I just sent her a chain letter.

273
00:18:45,180 --> 00:18:46,640
There's a dollar I'll never see.

274
00:18:48,120 --> 00:18:52,440
What a terrible night that was. I
remember we were trying to make a train

275
00:18:52,440 --> 00:18:53,940
connection to get back to Miami.

276
00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:57,320
Come on, girls, we only have ten minutes
to catch our next train.

277
00:18:57,660 --> 00:18:59,880
I don't think I can take another three
hours on a train.

278
00:19:00,350 --> 00:19:01,970
Oh, I'm looking forward to it.

279
00:19:02,370 --> 00:19:05,250
But then again, I've always loved
trains.

280
00:19:07,630 --> 00:19:09,150
Oh, excuse me.

281
00:19:09,450 --> 00:19:12,550
What track does the 915 to Miami leave
on?

282
00:19:13,010 --> 00:19:16,930
Well, ma 'am, we've only got one track,
but we call it track 19.

283
00:19:17,810 --> 00:19:21,670
Nobody knows why, but it sure gives
everybody something to talk about while

284
00:19:21,670 --> 00:19:24,130
they're waiting on the next tornado to
hit the mobile home.

285
00:19:28,780 --> 00:19:33,400
Thank you very much. Oh, and please say
hello to Opie and Aunt P for me when you

286
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:34,400
see them.

287
00:19:36,220 --> 00:19:39,700
Why don't we wait outside on the
platform? The train will be along in a

288
00:19:39,700 --> 00:19:43,460
minutes. The 915 to Miami left at 845.

289
00:19:45,100 --> 00:19:48,200
How could our train have left a half
hour early?

290
00:19:48,620 --> 00:19:51,240
Oh, all the trains out of Appalachia
leave early.

291
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:53,300
That's what our town's famous for.

292
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:58,480
Now, y 'all may think this sounds kind
of silly, but we actually printed, Our

293
00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:01,740
Trains Leave Early, right on the town
seal.

294
00:20:02,380 --> 00:20:03,860
You have a town seal?

295
00:20:04,540 --> 00:20:06,660
Can he play a song on his little horn?

296
00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:13,280
No, but he can balance a ball on his
nose if you throw him a catfish first.

297
00:20:15,180 --> 00:20:18,680
He's like a Twilight Zone somehow. We
got on a train that ended up inside

298
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:19,680
mind.

299
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:24,600
When is the next train to Miami?

300
00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:28,280
Well, we've got one scheduled to leave
at 6 a .m. tomorrow morning.

301
00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:31,160
Does that mean it'll actually leave at 5
.30?

302
00:20:31,460 --> 00:20:33,220
Welcome to Appalachobie.

303
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:40,380
Oh, I don't believe this. I mean, this
has to be the most depressing day of my

304
00:20:40,380 --> 00:20:43,580
life. First Edna McCarthy's funeral, now
this?

305
00:20:45,500 --> 00:20:48,840
You know, being at her funeral today
made me start thinking about how quickly

306
00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:49,840
life can pass you by.

307
00:20:50,770 --> 00:20:53,050
Maybe I ought to be more adventurous in
my life.

308
00:20:53,310 --> 00:20:54,310
More adventurous?

309
00:20:54,970 --> 00:20:58,330
The Kama Sutra had to publish a
supplement because of you.

310
00:20:59,030 --> 00:21:02,950
I'm not talking about men. I'm talking
about things I've always wanted to do

311
00:21:02,950 --> 00:21:04,050
never got around to trying.

312
00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:08,250
Well, Dorothy, didn't you ever have
something you wanted to do? You know,

313
00:21:08,250 --> 00:21:11,210
kind of secret desire you always kept on
the back burner? Mm -hmm.

314
00:21:11,490 --> 00:21:14,290
I always wanted to try a nudist camp.

315
00:21:14,630 --> 00:21:17,850
Some big pots belong on the back burner.

316
00:21:26,100 --> 00:21:28,960
Uh, don't you have a cousin you should
be dating?

317
00:21:35,420 --> 00:21:38,580
Wait a minute. I thought you said there
weren't any trains until morning.

318
00:21:38,820 --> 00:21:40,460
No more trains to Miami.

319
00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:42,900
That's the 920 to Sarasota.

320
00:21:43,220 --> 00:21:49,440
Oh, well, maybe we should try and get
some sleep. I'm not going to be able to

321
00:21:49,440 --> 00:21:50,940
sleep. I'm just too depressed.

322
00:21:56,970 --> 00:21:58,630
This has been a terrible day.

323
00:21:59,730 --> 00:22:04,030
A friend's funeral, stuck in a train
station in the middle of nowhere, trying

324
00:22:04,030 --> 00:22:05,490
sleep on a hard wooden bench.

325
00:22:06,390 --> 00:22:10,090
I don't think I have ever been this
depressed in my entire life.

326
00:22:24,940 --> 00:22:27,740
You know, Rose, you really ought to take
off some of that makeup before you go

327
00:22:27,740 --> 00:22:28,740
to sleep.

328
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:30,560
What?

329
00:22:32,120 --> 00:22:33,780
I don't believe it.

330
00:22:34,820 --> 00:22:38,360
A circus! Where did they come from?

331
00:22:38,620 --> 00:22:41,100
The 920 to Sarasota, the circus train.

332
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,960
Girls! This is a miracle.

333
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:47,960
Our paths crossed here so they could
cheer us up.

334
00:22:50,700 --> 00:22:52,360
Excuse me, Mr.

335
00:22:52,580 --> 00:22:53,580
Clown.

336
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:59,940
something to put smiles on the faces of
three gloomy cusses. Buzz off, lady. I'm

337
00:22:59,940 --> 00:23:01,060
on a cigarette break.

338
00:23:09,900 --> 00:23:12,320
What a terrible night that was.

339
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:15,840
Oh, it wasn't so bad. Something good did
come out of it.

340
00:23:16,220 --> 00:23:19,320
I dated Floppo the Clown for several
months after that.

341
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,000
You know, his feet really were that big.

342
00:23:27,060 --> 00:23:30,940
Which, of course, as I'm sure you're
both aware, means... Uh...

343
00:23:30,940 --> 00:23:37,160
Uh, is there any more of that, uh, ZD?

344
00:23:37,860 --> 00:23:41,360
Nope. Clean me out. There's not a drop
of food left. Oh, then what do you say

345
00:23:41,360 --> 00:23:42,360
call it a night, huh?

346
00:23:42,580 --> 00:23:45,920
Well, wait a minute. We haven't decided
what to do about Cousin Milo and Uncle

347
00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:48,920
Vito. Oh, yeah, I have an idea on that.
Look, they're both family. They'll

348
00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,780
understand. What do you say we all chip
in and put them up at the Holiday Inn?

349
00:23:52,240 --> 00:23:55,340
Oh, sounds good to me. Me too. What do
you think, Ma?

350
00:23:55,720 --> 00:24:00,620
You know, in the right hands and the
right bag, this chipped beef is not half

351
00:24:00,620 --> 00:24:01,620
bad.